Krilgorian Freedom Chronicle Beta 16
Contents
TACTICAL WITHDRAWL TO DREADLAR?!
DREADLAR--Only 20 turns into the latest round of galactic war, reports suggest the Krilgorian Fleet may be withdrawing from the Asteroid Fields. Newly appointed Kril Legion Commander Scubasteve was unavailable for comment, though the official line remains that the battle in the asteroids has yet to be decided.
When approached for comment on the current situation Kril pilot Aesirai stated that , " you ought to go see for yourself, and stop asking stupid questions."
- Author: Calonike
- Posted: 18 January 2005 22:4
KRIL FLEET TO RETURN HOME
Dreadlar--Following successful fleet operations that included a raid on Boraxus as well as action against elements of the Boraxian and Ajaxian fleets (I think...haven't actually left PK lately ), the Krilgorian Blob is due to return home for much needed refits and R&R. Local pubs and houses of ill repute are scrambling to prepare, with 500 tons of beer being flown in (the good stuff from the breweries on Garen, not the watered down stuff the Tibs drink).
OTHER NEWS
BORAXIAN PILOT BUZZES PK! PLANET KRILGORE
In an effort to strike a blow to fleet morale (and raise his own to new highs), Boraxian pilot the_hero has established a one ship blockade of PK in an effort to intercept the tankers transporting the spirits for the upcoming return of the Krilgorian Fleet.
== TIBRAN FLEET LOST, STOPS TO ASK FOR DIRECTIONS ASTEROIDS ==
Having trouble finding their way through the chaos of the Asteroid Fields (a problem exacerbated by not picking up a map at the last refueling stop) the Tibran LC was eventually forced to stop and ask a fleeing low-level Boraxian "which way was out". Quote one Tibran pilot, "I don't think we'll ever live this one down...".
DISCLAIMER: If news doesn't seem to follow actual events, just remember I make 1-2 ticks a day and am totally delusional.
- Author: Calonike
- Posted: 25 Januar 2005 1:54
KRILS RAID TIBRAR!!
TIBRAR--Catching the Tibran fleet away from home, the Krilgorian fleet raided the Tibran homeworld earlier today. Details remain sketchy, but primary targets appear to have included repair yards, enemy ships under repair, as well as many of the approximately 1 million Starbucks locations systemwide. Quote Kril pilot Ranthed, "Let's see them make those early morning ticks now".
With superior Tibran firepower rushing home to evict the interlopers, the raiding party has withdrawn relatively unscathed. More details to follow assuming I can be ****d to find any.
OTHER NEWS
PILOT CLEMENTUS TO REJOIN BLOB! GUESS! (Seriously, I don't know--let's say he's north somewhere.)--Fleet analysts are pert nigh giddy at the prospect of Clementus hooking back up with the blob. And not just for all the points the reppers will get either! Clem was of coursed dispatched on a "Top Secret" mission earlier in the week. Check our website for detailed 24 hour coverage on this important story!
COFFEE MARKET SKYROCKETS!! EVERYWHERE--With all 4 major warring factions targetting enemy coffee supplies in an effort to weaken the opposition, the price of coffee has skyrocketed and shortages become epidemic. Caffeine withdrawl has become the No. 1 health concern for the Krilgorian Fleet (replacing "getting blowed up" with fits of lethargy and sleepiness threatening fleet effectiveness.
CALONIKE TO REJOIN BLOB?! PK--Legendary hero Calonike, worshipped as a virtual god by people everywhere, is scheduled to grace the Kril blob with his august presence tomorrow (My shrink says I need to boost my self-esteem, how am I doing so far?). The debate tonight on our Critics Roundtable: Can he still fit into his cloaker with that massive ego? Does he even remember how to work NavCom? Who is he again?
Anybody wanna watch me accidently fly into the sun?
- Author: EwokDude
- Posted: 25 January 2005 21:0
Election Polls Show High Favor For Gorshak
With Zypher honerably stepping down after an exhausting albiet short run as LC, a new election came up. Nominations quickly flew about and the nominees each answered their nominations with great ease.
Suptorpedo: When nominated he decided to run and hide, a possum campaign which seems to have worked quite nicely.
EwokDude: Quickly added to the ballot when he actually added a comment concerning the LC opening made several campaign promises which he would be sure to fulfill. 1. To attempt to self destruct the base at least twice. 2. To re-arrange the squadrons and throw the legion into a ruckus. 3. To personally insult all the active pilots.
Gorshak: When asked what he would do if he were elected, he just referred reporters to EwokDude's comments and said "none of that" and his support couldn't be higher.
In other news, a small group of high levelled Kril pilots have gotten lost on the other side of Tibrar. While a search party has been sent out, squadmates seem skeptical. Keep an eye out for them as they may be chasing after the Tibran stragglers and many of them are known bunny hunters.
- Author: EwokDude
- Posted: 27 January 2005 17:48
Tibran Forces Flee in Terror
With two large fleets amassing against each other in the Aquarious and Acrador region, the Tibs and Krils were each tenative to make the first move. The Tibs attempted to strike first on the Krilgorian fleet in Acrador while the Krils were busy having an engaging discussion concerning foreign affairs. This attempted assault ended in tragedy for these furry slimeballs. Their retreat was rather hasty.
The Krils soon retaliated for the Tibs' ineffective attack by attacking the Tib fleet in Aquarious. The Tib fleet retreated at the first sign of danger or possibly because Senator Clementus was tearing their pilots apart on his own. The Krils decimated what was left as cannon fodder and are currently planning their next course of action.
Bors: Lost, Confused, or Trixy?
While the mighty Krilgorian fleet has been facing off the numerically superiour Tibran fleet in hopes of changing that around, the Bors have been seen wandering around the outer sectors of the galaxy for some unknown reason.
Some Counsel members were reached to comment on the matter: Roman: "I think they just have been out partying too much, I keep telling them to not drink and fly." EyeContact: "It's all part of the master plan, trust me"
In this reporter's opinion, they seem to be trying to take advantage of the inferior Ajaxian fleet while the Krils take on the challenge of the Tibs. Though a bit unkind on their part, it appears the Krils are up to the challenge.
Whatever opinions are on the matter, newly elected President Gorshak seems optimistic; so we should trust that things will work out in the end.
- Author: Harlock
- Posted: 10 February 2005 4:37
BREAKING NEWS
Due to a shortage of paper in our beautiful homeworld of Krilgore, the Krilgorian Freedom Chronicle has not been distributed in some time. In it's absence, i bring you from my cruiser to your overhead display :
Krilgorian Action News at 11
Eating THIS food could make you go blind. The problem? It's standard issue in every pilot's rations. Which item is it? We'll tell you later. First, off to our top story :
Krils and Tibs?
Could it be that the Krils and Tibs have put aside their differences and have teamed up against a greater evil? It seems so. Recent diplomatic envoys confirm that our supreme ruler and commander in chief has declared a cease fire between the two feuding legions to take down the Boraxian homeworld.
Pilots rejoiced as we now have full access to the infinte stores of Tibran pretzels to go with our top quality Krilgorian beer.
Of course, this also means local beer sales have been booming and the Tibran pilots have never been happier. Quote an anonymous Tib pilot : - "Those pretzels were making me thirsty"
No show
Even though friendly pilots confirm that there is no enemy military presence in Boraxus, pilots are still hesitant to join the offensive. When asked why, fellow pilot Inferno* had this to answer : - "I have been partying for the last 6 days in a row. I am sleeping tonight"
Cowards
As mentioned earlier, the Boraxians seem to have fled before the incredible might of the allied Kril/Tib armada. Only one pilot seemed to have stayed to save his honor and face us in bloody battle, but later ran away to hide after having aquired a bigger ship. This reporter has tried to interview Chainsaw, but to no avail. We have but this brief recording : - *distant girlish screams from afar*
This is Harlock, reporting on site. We now return you to our showing of Debbie Does Ajaxus
